antinous

in the seam of solitary deeds
the memory succeeds in the heart bleed
in the wake of exceeding structure
mixed up with the rough rough
pounding, hell hounding through the walls
let it fall, trickle thick down my thighs
an elusive high
-sigh

I cannot have you

like when you slipped
beyond my grip
and the myth rose up in roses
the grand apotheosis
and the lover left low
heavy with the dream of lead
a bone for the trigger, morning dove
left for dead


on the same streets I extract
in exact tones and breezes
the hair in face, whiplash brash
kiss tokens took at night
-the seizure
a thimble on your sill
a blood rush silent still
quietly quietly

numbing the spot for the needle
in a feeble limb
inject to eject
destroy to erect
a fence to keep my senses
from wandering to where you'd lay
for days and days and days
your body in for the deed
a finger on the mouth you'd tease
please
don't you leave me with the hollow
you're too hard to swallow

but gone
you are
gone
I cannot have you
and I cannot follow
I see your darkened hollow
blackened eye, hole in sky
heart swollen

a delicate demise